How Talking About Sexual Wellness Can Improve Your Relationship

What does “Sexual Health and Wellness” Mean? 

Before you can talk about sexual health and wellness, first you have to know what it actually is. When thinking about sexual wellness, most people jump to sexually transmitted infections, condoms, and testing. While all these things are important, it’s just the tip of the iceberg! Sexual health and wellness includes how we feel about ourselves, the things we desire, our sexuality, gender identity, and pursuing pleasure the way we want it. 

WHO defines sexual health as “a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality; it is not merely the absence of disease, dysfunction or infirmity. Sexual health requires a positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. For sexual health to be attained and maintained, the sexual rights of all persons must be respected, protected and fulfilled.”

How Should I Bring Up Sexual Wellness

When you’re having conversations about sex, your first instinct might be to bring it up while you’re getting intimate. We recommend you have these talks before you head to the bedroom. This can help take the pressure out of the situation. Instead, let your partner know you want to set aside a bit of time to get to know each other’s desires a bit better. 

You can have a nice, romantic, candlelit dinner or discuss over a cup of coffee at home. Try to keep the conversation light and fun while still being heartfelt with your lover. Some people can get a bit defensive when it comes to talking about sex, so let them know you’re having these talks to strengthen your bond and bring both of you more pleasure, not to criticize anyone’s performance. 

What to Talk About

So you’ve decided to talk to your lover about your sexual wellness, great! But what the heck are you even supposed to say? The most important thing is to be open and honest with your partner, which can be intimidating if you’ve never done it before! Be prepared to tell them what you feel comfortable with, what you’d like to try, and all the things that are on your “never gonna happen” list. 

Learning about your partner’s hidden kinks and fetishes can lead to more openness in your relationship. And who knows, you might even find things you never knew you wanted to try that you end up loving! It can be nerve-wracking sometimes, but having these conversations is a vital step if you want your intimate relationship and the pleasures you experience together to flourish.

We recommend trying to think of a list of new kinks or positions or activities you want to try out with your partner. Maybe you’d like to give mutual masturbation a go, or maybe you’re dying to listen to audio erotica together! Whatever the case may be, take some time to get to know what you want, so you can convey all those things to your lover.

This is also a good time to ask your partner to get tested for STIs together, if you never have before and need to check your status! 

What Adult Toys Can We Use Together?

Let’s start off strong with Cal Exotics' Silicone Recharge Triple Orgasm Enhancer. This powerful cockring is made with high-quality silicone, is rechargeable, and is water-proof! The tight stretchy ring maximizes sensitivity and elevates sensation which allows for longer, more powerful pleasure! With up to 80 minutes of intense play time and 12 powerful vibration patterns, it’s sure to keep you and your partner excited! It’s equipped with two flickering rabbit teasers that deliver full contact to both users and stimulates multiple pleasure zones. 

Our next rec is Evolved's "The Monarch". What we love the most about this toy is that it’s multi-use. While it’s made with couples in mind, it works amazing for solo play as well! This toy is also waterproof and submersible. It’s equipped with three shafts to play in any way you want, including a strapless strap-on! One of the shafts is removable for solo play and has a cover for the port for when the shaft is not in use. 

We truly believe the prostate is one of the unsung heroes of erogenous zones. Show it the love it deserves with Evolved's Gender X Mad Tapper. This double-tapping, vibrating massager has ten vibrating speeds in the main shaft, five tapping speeds on the main shaft, and five pulsating speeds in the ball on the base shaft. It has three motors all controlled separately and is completely submersible!

Next up, for a little extra fun in or out of the bedroom, we recommend Pipedream's Fantasy For Her Crotchless Panty. These sexy panties fit most waists from around size US 4-16 and just as the name suggests, they are crotchless for easy access! These can be worn for solo or couples play, they are wireless, and the remote allows you to control it from afar! The pocket-sized vibrator that makes these panties extra special can be removed so that you can just rock the crotchless panties if you want. 

Toys cannot live alone. They need companions, and those companions are known as lube and cleansers! First up we have one of our own delicious, flavored lubes! Starship Intimate Care Peach Flavored Lube 4oz is great for couples and for solo play with toys! This lube is delicious Georgia Peach flavored. It is also condom-friendly and water-based, so it’s safe to use with silicone toys. As always, it’s never sticky or tacky and cleans up easily, it’s also free of glycerin, paraben, and gluten.

Did you know that it is recommended to clean your toys before and after use? To keep your toys clean, try a cleanser like Wicked Sensual Care's Simply Foam and Fresh 7oz. We love this one because it’s vegan, as well as paraben, and propylene glycol-free. It’s also pH-balanced, alcohol-free, and infused with essential oils and Olive Leaf Extract. It will leave your toys sparkling clean and will leave no residue behind.